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Tuesday, January 25, 2011

"Why are you Persecuting me?"

This very day has not been a pleasant one. I woke up late and was late for school. However that was not all, I was suppose to go out with a friend for a movie, but it was also cancelled. Something else cropped up. Of coz life still has to move on!! Unsure of what to do, my feet lead me to the adoration room in Divine Mercy Church where I felt very peaceful and calm. Also tot that I might one day want to bring my Godson here to have a look. As I sat before the Lord, I was reflecting on the readings of today. It was about Saul Persecuting the Christians. I do not know why but words of scriptures kept coming into my head as though something was going to happen. But yet within this turmoil and pain , He will still be there. I know I have been a led down. I have not been a good daughter of Christ at some point in time. Confused and puzzled by the mix feelings I have, I headed home. To my surprise my dad was at the lift landing & I just ran up to him and he helped me with my tons of things I needed to carry. Tired after a days work I fell asleep only to be awoken by some crazy news.

Never in my life have I trembled with worry as my hands turned cold & face turned pale. Someone ridiculously call to find her child who has miraculously disappeared. The most DRAMA part is that she even threaten to call the police. Gosh! How much more absurd can this be man!!! Is this how the mothers of the 21st Century behave? With all that knowledge you have gained, all you resort to is the Police! As funny as it is, I nearly fell on the floor laughing. Firstly, if everyone's child goes missing & I must know their whereabouts, than shouldn't I open a childcare or better off, been send in for questioning many times a year since i have so many close friends. Secondly, this goes to show how much communication one has with her child for them to leave without saying a word. Own child also cannot handle, need to push the blame of your incapabilities to someone else to take the rap for you? Well That's pretty sad! Thirdly, Piang eh! all this education that one has gained IQ so high EQ so low, Sigh ! wonder what they teach in the textbooks nowadays! Do you have to stoop to a low level to threaten someone. Sad Case! Hmmm O I guess they didn't teach you in the textbooks how to let go of your child & not be a control freak! hehe ! Forthly, have i ever said in my past blogs, that I hate hypocrites and backstabbers. Oh guess she didn't read it huh! Share with you a piece a news, she even got her Godmother to talk to me! aiyo! Guess people who don't know me by now, this scare tactic doesn't work on me!! Take your childish mind games to the playground of your own. 1st don't go behind people's back and backstab 2nd dare to get angry , don't dare to admit your incapabilties.

But that aside, my heart went out to know what happen to this friend of mine. I have not heard news in a while. At this point I just wanted to know where my friend was. was my friend alright ? was my friend safe? And of coz i hope my friend doesn't do something STUPID - recalling 5 promises. I prevented myself from laughing & only to ask "Do you know where is my friend? Is my friend home? "

Of coz certainly, my dad was the person who picked up the phone and apparently my dad was really upset with the situation. Lovingly as he has always been to me, he wasn't at all upset with me, but with the person on the other line. Fierce as he initially sounded to me, his words of love touched me really deeply "I am not angry with you, but only want to know all this coz I want to protect you my child!"

I guess God has his weird sense of humour, just at the same time, Matt & Paul were suppose to meet me. But what is best of all is not only them spent the night with me even my TOL family spent the entire evening with me. We spoke no words of the issue but just spend time playing games together at Macs. This is what Family is suppose to be, supporting each other in times of needs.

In this situation, I felt just the same as Christ in the readings of today. Blamed, persecuted and killed. I know I have not done anything wrong except for the fact that I have chosen to be there for a friend in times of need. And standing from an outsiders POV, this is simply a dirty linen of a family issue that is hung outside for the world to see. And no matter what happens, I know HE will be by my side watching and guiding me along the way. I will always take each situation as Christ's way of teaching me & moulding me. At the beginning I was kinda worried, ... than I learnt to take a step back and see... This is not my battle to fight, It is HIS! - get my drift

Dear God,
As I lay down to sleep, I pray that you cover me with your precious blood & protect those that I love from harm and danger.
Let tomorrow be a new day, a new beginning and a fresh start.
If it is possible, take this cup from me & let not my will but yours be done.

Your Daughter


Anonymous said...


starlight_baby said...

Thank you !!