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Thursday, December 30, 2010

Dear God,

Yet another interesting day out. With friends, work colleagues and even play. I even saw u at mass though I know I was talking most of the time. But as we had our thanks giving party today, I am glad to see our confirmands having a fun time. Though there were indeed many ups and downs, I do thank you for the life you gave me this past year. Thank you for using me as your instrument.

Your daughter

1 John 2:15 - 17

Do not love the world or the things of the world.
If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.
For all that is in the world,
sensual lust, enticement for the eyes, and a pretentious life,
is not from the Father but is from the world.
Yet the world and its enticement are passing away.
But whoever does the will of God remains forever.

This passage really hit me hard at mass today & as I stood there reflecting on these words, I tot to myself, "to what extend am I attached to the world?" a question i used to ask myself when I was in secondary school & polytechnic. Somehow I used to tell my parents that I if one day Jesus was to take me, know that I am happy where I am. I am ready & I know he is going to take care of me. But in some point in time, this started to change. Reality starts to set in, fear of worldly detachment sets in. I always ask for one more day rather than refusing his offer. Guess this passage was a wake up call to my insensitivity to HIM. It also shows me my failings as a product of God especially when I get suck into the world, conforming to its needs & wants. How about you ? How are you surviving in this world? Are you hostile towards God and alienated from him?

Well Loving of the world and loving of God are thus mutually exclusive. Loving the world & all that is within , is indeed good. BUT have you ever thought... if one day, just one day all these "beautiful" things fade away - what is left of you? Who is going to take care of you. None other that the one who created you. But Loving God is another thing, He has no other condition but to ask of us to love the people he has placed in our lives. Today we are once again challenge to do the will of God. Sometimes, the will of God really requires for us to love those who are hardest to love, to shed light onto people who find it hard to feel the presence of HIS love.

But of coz, this reading also talks on the Sensual lust that one may have. This includes "the lust of the flesh," inordinate desire for physical gratification. Enticement for the eyes: literally, "the lust of the eyes," ; the eyes are regarded as the windows of the soul. Pretentious life: literally, "pride of life," arrogance or ostentation in one's earthly style of life that reflects a willful independence from God and others.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Are we hypocrites ?

As I was reflecting on the readings of today, I recall stumbling upon a comment of one of my cousins stating at we are all hypocrites. This word lingered in my head and it kind of relates back to the readings of today from 1 John 2:3-11

The way we may be sure that we know Jesus
is to keep his commandments.
Whoever says, “I know him,” but does not keep his commandments
is a liar, and the truth is not in him.
But whoever keeps his word,
the love of God is truly perfected in him.
This is the way we may know that we are in union with him:
whoever claims to abide in him ought to walk just as he walked

In this passage it says of those who have claimed to have known Christ and therefore knows him - is not just merely through the intellectual knowledge but the obedience to God's commandments in a life conformed to the example of Christ; this confirms our knowledge of him and is the love of God . . . perfected. Disparity between moral life and the commandments proves improper belief. I guess this passages this few days really brings me back to the times when someone asked me, "what is it like to live a live in Christ?" The readings of today clearly states that in order for us to have known HIM, is for him to have truly lived in us & if he is in us, we will manifest him through our thoughts, words and actions of LOVE.

Just like the saying that when someone in love, we claim to have known him. But none the least you will definitely, in time to come, take on the characteristic of the other - the way they talk, walk, think and behave.

Whoever says he is in the light,
yet hates his brother, is still in the darkness.
Whoever loves his brother remains in the light,
and there is nothing in him to cause a fall.
Whoever hates his brother is in darkness;
he walks in darkness
and does not know where he is going
because the darkness has blinded his eyes.

This is where i found the passage mostly relating to the hypocritical side of humans. At times when we can get all holy, go to church, serve in ministries, but at the end of it create politics , backstabbing, an utterly ugly side of the us as humans. I guess I also say so for people in and outside of church. Some fellow Christian bro n sis. They claim to be in CHRISTians but yet when it comes to living out our christian values, it takes a 180 degrees turn. "I would only love if ....." Aren't we all called to LOVE? To give the unconditional Love to everyone? To love those that are hardest to love - colleagues, family members, friends, students, teachers or adults? aren't we just mere Hypocrites?

In today's reading Christ also challenges us to express the continuity and freshness of mutual charity in Christian experience - wherever we are (not only in church). And if we say that Christ is the commandment of love and has become the light. He would be the one who can defeat the darkness. All hatred as darkness is incompatible with the light and Christian life.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Tell the Truth all the Time

Normally in the readings of the day I would never focus much on the readings but mostly on the Gospel. But somehow today's reading hit me. It touched me quite deep & set me thinking about things. The readings was taken from 1 John 1:5 - 2:2

God is light, and in him there is no darkness at all.
If we say, “We have fellowship with him,”
while we continue to walk in darkness,
we lie and do not act in truth.

When i opened the page of the readings & I reflecting on this passage. It made me realize that whenever, as humans, we always say "we are Catholics" a loyal follower of Christ, a believer and a person who attends mass every day or every week. But how much do we act in the truth? and in fact walk in the light of Christ. I remember at con camp my Godson told me, "I am not a catholic". I got quite defensive at first coz I always believe that once we are baptize into this family of God we are forever catholics. But as I pondered about this passage what he says kinda make sense to me. The reason for him not admitting to be a "catholic" was the way he felt he has / was lead his life - in darkness and lost in experiential part of his faith - as well as the in ability to comprehend the God whom we all talk about. As I sat here thinking these questions, I tot to myself how many of us really are able to comprehend God - ZERO ! How many of us who admit to be Christ followers, really walk in the Light? Are we really Christ Followers or are we Hypocrites?

But if we walk in the light as he is in the light,
then we have fellowship with one another,
and the Blood of his Son Jesus cleanses us from all sin.

But what exactly is the "Light" we are talking about ? John 3:19 , 17:17 and Eph 5:8 talks about the same light. Light is to be understood as truth and goodness; darkness here is error and depravity. I simply can't imagine living life in darkness, deceit and where backstabbing, bitch fighting occurs constantly. I recall Fr Yim said this phrase at a baptism mass a couple of weeks ago "Tell the truth, ALL the TIME, coz God is Truth"

To walk in light or darkness is to live according to truth or error, not merely intellectual but moral as well. Sometimes in life we might just forgo our moral standards to live according to the expectations of society. But when we are baptize into this family of God, we are called to Fellowship with God and with one another. Upholding a life according to the truth as found in God and in Christ. BUT than this may seem easy for me to just type on the blog but it is never easy to carry out. So how? That's where in our incapability, we rely on the HOly spirit and God to help us live a life of truth.

If we say, “We are without sin,” we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we acknowledge our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive our sins and cleanse us from every wrongdoing.

Since we are called to live a life of Truth, we need to know what the conditions of sins are. However the delibrate denial of the condition of sin is self-deception and even contradictory of divine revelation; - hence it is like a sin over another sin. There was someone who told me that they don't find what they have done sinful. I stood there frozen for a few mins & I wondered how could that be so. I guess how I would reply to that person would be to think of all those things we have done in our lives and how has it showed ourselves to be faithful and loving to God?

If we say, “We have not sinned,” we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.

Well like we all should have by now know that we are all sinners & we by saying at the point of confession that we have no sin, we are lying. But none the least what marvels me the most is the constant love and mercy Christ has for us to be able to absorb us off all our sins no matter how unfaithful and unloving we are to HIM. Can you think of the times you someone has hurt you, was it easy to say , I forgive you & lets forget about the incident and move on? What made you do that? At the end of this I too stopped and think , though we may at times be hypocrites or sinners, God still loves us. All the same.

Forgiveness and deliverance from sin through Christ are assured through acknowledgment of them and repentance.

My children, I am writing this to you
so that you may not commit sin.
But if anyone does sin, we have an Advocate with the Father,
Jesus Christ the righteous one.
He is expiation for our sins,
and not for our sins only but for those of the whole world.

I like this last part of the reading coz it really sums it up for me - to be ever ready for his kingdom to remain in the state of grace at all times with him in order to enjoy his mercy and love. and


Friday, December 24, 2010

Christmas Eve With My love ones!!!

Oh my !! our current batch & oldies from TOL ... memories & I do miss old times as much as I would yearn for new happenings.

Nothing Beats having a bunch of friends you love around you for Christmas Eve Mass!!

Confirmands & TOL

My most outstanding TLs in 2010... I love you man Louis

SUPER Late Supper with my GODSON!!! as usual Camwhoring away in MACS

NICK & ME... 1st time attending mass together.

PAUL & ME... every year I never fail to take a pic with you... Thanks for standing by me all this times

Andy & James.... hmmm great friendship forged... I would not foresee this coming 3 months back .....remember ...

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Lets see... Christmas Coming so .. tot i post some nice christmas song for you all & may you have a blessed and Merry Christmas

Oh my .. this is one of the best Christmas Song sang by this movie.
For all those who are searching for Christmas ...

This is by Faith Hill!!

My Mother's Fav Song

Away in a Manger ... how gently the messiah lies... Hearing this song brings back memories from my Primary school Christmas Pageant.

This song reminds me of the times when i was young sitting by my bedside listening to cassette tapes during the christmas periods... awaiting for SANTA to come and hoping my parents will go to sleep early so I can get my presents.

oh my .. this song is just amazing .. u know this song is a 49 sec song in batman show and lasted for more than 10 years... gosh!!! good marketing strategy !

My Daddy used to sing this for me... Gosh !! I miss him singing this ! HE use to strum the guitar for me.

This song reminds me of a christmas caroling I did some many years ago.

As Much as this song brings back memories, I guess my godson have been slowly journeying with me to allow me to accept this song again. Thanks.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Strength will rise as we wait upon the LORD

This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about.
When his mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph,
but before they lived together,
she was found with child through the Holy Spirit.
Joseph her husband, since he was a righteous man,
yet unwilling to expose her to shame,
decided to divorce her quietly.
Such was his intention when, behold,
the angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said,
“Joseph, son of David,
do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home.
For it is through the Holy Spirit
that this child has been conceived in her.
She will bear a son and you are to name him Jesus,
because he will save his people from their sins.”
All this took place to fulfill
what the Lord had said through the prophet:

Behold, the virgin shall be with child and bear a son,
and they shall name him Emmanuel,

which means “God is with us.”
When Joseph awoke,
he did as the angel of the Lord had commanded him
and took his wife into his home.
He had no relations with her until she bore a son,
and he named him Jesus.

Have you ever ask about the mystery of Christ and his Coming? Do you often find loopholes in the Faith you "so called" believe in? Does it bothers why others still continue believing in this Faith but you can't? Well here is another.

As I reflected on this passage, I Recall the previous day's gospel reading that the Messiah was to be born from the lineage of King David. Hence it cannot be fulfilled by Mary, as in those times, ancestry is counted only through the Father. This is also incidentally no indication that Mary is of David's Line. So what happen than? Did something go wrong somewhere? Upon reflection I realized that All this happen through the power of the HOLY SPIRIT , indicating the divinity of Christ into the House of David. Coz at that time, there was no such thing as DNA or Test tube baby - the only 2 ways of getting a possible BOY is by (1) by solemn declaration that he adopts a son or (2) by marriage & consummation. Since Mary was a virgin, it is only but by the 1st way that Jesus becomes the son of David.

Sometimes Faith is not always about trying to link points to points in the bible but comprehending the Mystery and Power of the God so that it can withstand rigorous examinations and exploring the implication of that faith for all aspect of human life with your head and loving HIM more and more with your heart.

Dear God,

As I marvel at your awesomeness, teach me to reflect deeply into your word each day and spend time in peace and stillness, embracing your love and your wisdom. Your infinite power amazes me but yet puts me right where i belong - nothing but a creation of your love. Dearest Father as i cry out to you this day, I am tired, I can't go on, I do not know where to go, what to do & what more even what to say. It is only by your strength that I can go through this. Teach me , guide me and mould me to be your humble servant and instrument of Love. At times words of others hurts me, it pains me to even think of how to face them again, but God grant me the ability to forgive what others have done to me.


Your Daughter

"be still and know that I am God."

Friday, December 17, 2010

My Family - Welcome Everyone

Dear God,

Thank you for this day ! I have tons of fun with everyone around. Spending every single minute with them was a fun time. omg !

Your Daughter.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Dear God,

Thanks for sending me such a sweet Godson, My Godson sang this for me ... it really was very sweet of him to sing this song & the lyrics really hit me very deeply.

I pray you’ll be our eyes
And watch us where we go
And help us to be wise
In times when we don’t know

Let this be our prayer
As we loose our way
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your grace
To a place where we’ll be safe

Your Daughter

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Dear God,

Have anyone ever asked who u are to them? ? What you made them for? Why are they on this earth ? what is their purpose? The words of Isaiah spoke to me. Right to the depths of my hearts answering the questions from within. Reading this passage helped me to be still and marvel at the ability of you that I call father. I recalled once someone asked me, Who is this God? How do we know if this God exist? This passage though an inspired writing of Prophet Isaiah, it still carries with it much weight of truth & we are all called to be open & listen to GOD.

In this passage Isaiah speaks of this God as the maker of tis earth that we are living in and he is not creating it to be wasted but to create it for living. We shall not have other Gods beside him- Why do you even want to have some other God when this guy here created everything so beautiful just for us. So wonderful and so nice for us to live.


Your Daughter

Is 45:6c-8, 18, 21c-25

I am the LORD, there is no other;
I form the light, and create the darkness,
I make well-being and create woe;
I, the LORD, do all these things.
Let justice descend, O heavens, like dew from above,
like gentle rain let the skies drop it down.
Let the earth open and salvation bud forth;
let justice also spring up!
I, the LORD, have created this.

For thus says the LORD,
The creator of the heavens,
who is God,
The designer and maker of the earth
who established it,
Not creating it to be a waste,
but designing it be lived in:
I am the LORD, and there is no other.

Who announced this from the beginning
and foretold it from of old?
Was it not I, the LORD,
besides whom there is no other God?
There is no just and saving God but me.

Turn to me and be safe,
all you ends of the earth,
for I am God; there is no other!
By myself I swear,
uttering my just decree
and my unalterable word:
To me every knee shall bend;
by me every tongue shall swear,
Saying, “Only in the LORD
are just deeds and power.
Before him in shame shall come
all who vent their anger against him.
In the LORD shall be the vindication and the glory
of all the descendants of Israel.”

Tuesday, December 14, 2010


I remember when I felt I was called by YOU , you are all I wanted. I owe this life to you. Till this very day, I do not know what your plans for me are, but I can truly say, you are still the one I love.

My dear friends, Have you ever felt that you have done someone wrong & you really want to apologies and seek forgiveness from HIM or HER? How did you feel while trying to seek forgiveness? Guilty? Sorry ? In order to make him or her happy, you don't mind putting down your pride & be a "clown" in front of her? How you ever experience it before?

Today is penitential service in church & as I sat in the pew awaiting my turn for confession, I was reflecting on my sins. The heavy weight of guilt overwhelm my heart and I really feel as though I have hurt a best friend. It is so pain that I was reluctant to even speak to anyone for that moment but to HIM whom I love.

Dear God,

This very day, I come to you with all humility. I am stripped off all my sins & i just want to come to you running & give you the biggest hug ever. Father, in 2000 I remember that very reconciliation with you I sat there for an hour just recalling your love & how merciful you really am. I had tears rolling down my face just putting my pride down at your feet.

Today's reconciliation was just the same. The ambience the mood. It was really solemn & meditative. I couldn't help but recall this love of yours. As I sat there & hear the words of Fr Mike, Like inspired words of wisdom, he reminded me - it is time to get back to my blog & get back in touch with you & spend the quiet times I use to have with you again. This would be my new year resolution to myself & I would make it a point to least spend 1 hour a day with you.

Your Daughter

Monday, December 06, 2010

Dear God,

Have you ever felt heavy at heart, something you have done has been very bad u dono what to do about it? Have you felt sorry that you have let someone down before?

Today I felt really bad. I felt I was v irresponsible to people under my charge. I should not have done the things I did. But somehow whatever you do wrong, be willing to admit to your faults. "Pride is the downfall of all mankind but humility is the uproar of an empire." I laid it down at your feet Lord, I did it. You taught me humility, u showed me. No matter how my friends told me it is not my fault, I still did this for you Lord.

God Grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change;
the courage to change the things i can ;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

I feel so small without you leading and guiding me.
Teach me how to be more like you.

Your Daughter

Sunday, December 05, 2010

Miracles in my life

You know how i always find that my life is full of unexpected fun, trills and adventure.
well this one led me in this steep jump. a deeper leap into my faith journey with him.
the last 7 days was the most thrilling rollar coaster ride.

It was quite a while back when I happen to stumble on this guy who was standing outside adoration room just before class. I walked up to him and chatted. He asked me questions which left me speechless (certainly he was quite happy to have left me dumb founded). Guess somehow in me, I wanted to help me and know answers for myself & i guess he was kinda God's way of Leading me to think more about God and his purpose for me.

For a couple of weeks I have asking searching for some answers. Until one point I tot to myself, Why am I searching so much when the answer in right smack in my face. HE IS THE ANSWER.
Sometimes In life am i wanting to find a logical explanation or a reason to challenge every single answer I have, refusing to be open to what he has for me. OF COZ, I STOPPED.

Things led up to confirmation camp where I had a closer chance to talk to him. I just couldn't coz it is not within my capabilities. I asked Fr Stan to talk to him. Still it was not what he wanted.

The next day, he said, probably this religion is not the one i want. That time I knew that it was not me who should be there for him. I needed someone else. That someone who is able to answer him. HE is non other than his own creator - GOD. During one session, when i was told to be still and call upon the Lord. I too did so. And He just said. "tell him to give me 1 more chance." but in my head i just said "HOW? and WHY ... since he has made up his mind?" than later a scene from NICK session came to me, the passion of Christ & I heard a soft voice from behind me say "coz I love HIM & u are my instrument." SO... reluctantly i got the message across to him. HE broke down at dinner .. didn't eat much for his meal but that night I stayed up just chatting with him and this time, I prayed before so it was so much more easier and i know HE was by my side trying to talk to him.

What i realise was that Somehow it came to a point where i was relying on my own strength to push on trying to help him. I broke down. I could not do so. But it was when I could let go and let God take place in me that I could move on.

Lesson learn "if only when we are willing to have More of him and less of us. Acknowledging that we are just to be his instrument, can his love be shown to everyone."

By that night he had 5 days to find out why he needs and want to be confirmed. I have been journeying with him for this 5 days seeing him grow & learn to love the people around him. He too has slowly broken down his " wall of defence " towards me, slowly he start to feel for things and not with his HEAD. I saw him change. Guess what just a day before confirmation I became his Godma. How in the world did this happen , I do not know. but this miracle boy has really taught me patience.

Thursday, December 02, 2010

Dear God,

Just another 3 days, I can count the no. of days. Excited to see them become your soldiers but yet I love them alot to let them go.
As I was listening to this song I realise it is not me but it is you who has the directions for them.

No matter how you come to them, you will be leading them & guiding them.

Your Daughter

Consuming Fire

Wednesday, December 01, 2010

Dear God

Confirmation is coming ...This means that time with them is called to an end. As I look through the pictures we took, I recalled the times I had with them. Tears filled my eyes as I recalled the times we had, the laughter in class outside and even the times we had sharing.
But God I know you are always with them. No matter how far they are, I will know you are with them ALWAYS.

Your Daughter