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This is somewhere I voice my feelings & thoughts.
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Saturday, January 30, 2010


My Day started off well today ,
Somehow it was really nice talking to sister.
I realized what i need to do and what I should do for myself
However evening turned out bad, now came home without dinner. :(
Was suppose to have dinner guessed it really went bad.
Maybe sometimes people are right , I bring things unto myself,
(Everything is my fault. - my family , my cousin, my friends look at me as though it is all my fault.) Why do those people I love (not just family members) , love to shout at me, get angry with me and hurt me. Do they not know that I do not like them to shout at me? Do they not know it hurts me? Does my forehead write there, "shout at Erica or be angry with Erica !" I have feelings too , I do feel pain. As much as I love you to let you go do what you want, I do have feelings too.
This morning while praying , I remembered what sister said, as much as you are growing , you should also be aware of the little child in you that is hurt. It brought tears to my eyes, as I know how much I always care about others and want the best for them, I would surely let that heart inside me get hurt. Guess I would slowly close up my heart from all these hurts & nurse it till I am ready.

Reflecting on todays reading this phrase struck me When Jesus asked his disciples, “Why are you terrified? Do you not yet have faith?” Well this month , I thought to myself, only the Lord knows what I am feeling , what i am going through apart for some significant other, only he is able to comprehend all these. He is my God in whom the heavens, the seas and even the wind obey him . I would nv fail to run to him in times of need and joy . yet another day of close walk with him .

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